Stellai’s blog December 2015: Exclusive interview with Santa

Dear readers,
I have been warned, I admit. I receive so many warnings every day that I can fill an encyclopedia with them. So, it is not surprising that I have developed a certain kind of deafness over the years. The surprising thing about my deafness is that by some it is interpreted as me being stubborn, pig headed - the doll that used that word was clearly in need of new spectacles - obstinate and even stupid. Whereas others interpret it as me being independent, autonomous, sensible and sometimes even wise. Personally I like to see my 'deafness' more as a kind of self-preservation. Indeed there are certain risks to ignoring a warning, but the fundament for research and self-development is exploring. When you look upon it as such, a warning is no more than a sign that says: Attention, after this point it is becoming really interesting!
I have been warned, I admit. According to the recently new PA (publisher's assistant) my last contribution as a reporter was already in June of this year. It was about the pretended abuse of alcohol of Koen to seduce Fabienne, he helped me remember. For which I had him crawl on his knees in his new blaser and tweed pants through the garden's shrubbery, shooting pictures with his tele lens camera like a paparazzi, he helped me remember. That was the last time he would do me a favour, he helped me remember.
I have been warned, I admit. By that same former colleague, who likely is 'soon-to-become-your-boss's-boss', which he accidently dropped as if it was just a slip of the tongue, while he delicately pointed out that my position as 'star reporter' can also and easily be transferred into 'star reporter', meaning: an at-best-ordinary reporter of real stars.
I have been warned, I admit. In this job costs for travelling and hotels are not included. Neither are costs for food - that is fine by me, I don't eat - and representation - that sucks big time, because my friend Lissa is getting new outfits almost weekly and she is about to become a terrible show off. Especially now her BF has become PA.
I have been warned, I admit. My camera is not designed for the North Pole. It turns out that I should have taken this warning more seriously. I have shot the most spectacular photos imaginable of Santa flying with his reindeer sledge through the northern lights, Santa taking care of his 'reindeers' in a blizzard, Santa peeing sculptures of ice, Santa fucking Red nose, who by the way looks surprisingly much like Lissa once she managed to get out of her reindeer suit. I do not think that Lissa herself already has a reindeer suit. Well, given the new developments at the office I am sure that she will get one some day soon.
I know, this photo series could have been a new break-through in my career. But alas! Next time I will make sure NOT to pour water in a camera to compensate the sudden increase of crystals in the liquid crystal display.
I have been warned, I admit. Santa is not a very talkative doll. Indeed I had to do most of the talking, but you will be surprised what you can achieve with the right line of questioning ;)

Interview with Santa
Cool place you have here Santa. I hope you don't mind me calling you Santa?
Ho-ho-ho.
Oh sorry, then what should I call you? Mister Santa, Santa Claus, Mister Claus, Santa-baby, Clausie-bausie?
Ho-ho-ho!!!
Yeah, I agree, better just move on to the next question. I hope you agree it is best just to stick with me calling you Santa.
Ho-ho-ho!!!
Ohh, haha, Ho-ho-ho! Yeah, now I get it. Sure, no problemo ehh... Ho-ho-ho! Gosh, whoever came up with the name 'Santa' or 'Santa Claus'?!
Ho-ho-hoo!
Ohh,...ehhh,...ahhhhh, you came up with it yourself. But why, if I may ask? I think 'Ho-ho-ho' is a very catchy name. It is easy to remember and I think it will make you incredibly popular amongst Asian dolls. They love these kind of names.
Ho-ho-ho!
Ehh,... sorry but I did not quite get that last answer of yours. Is that 'Ho-ho-ho' as in 'Yeah, my name is Ho-ho-ho and I am going to be very popular amongst Asian dolls, yo-ho-ho!'? Or is it that you meant to say 'Ho-ho-ho', meaning no-no-no?
Ho-ho-hoo!!
Ahh, I see.
So, Santa,... I mean Ho-ho-ho, my readers have requested me to ask you what your favourite color wig is?
Ho-ho-hoo!
Of course, that answer was to be expected. Questions of readers can very useful sometimes.
I hope you do not mind me asking, but I am becoming very much interested in your relation with your so called reindeers. When I arrived here you were fucking Red nose in her reindeer suit. Are the other reindeers also in fact incredibly hot looking dolls dressed in reindeer suits?
Hoo-ho-ho!
And you have sex with them every now and then?
Hoo-ho-hoo!
Is it really? That is more than most dolls have in a lifetime. And they all do you simultaneously?

Ho-hoo-ho!
Well, that certainly explains the happy smile on your face. But do you not need to take care of making presents for dolls during the year? After all it is a lot of presents that need to be delivered at Christmas.
Ho-ho-hoo!
That is an interesting answer. I agree that the weather circumstances at the North Pole do not leave much room for outdoor activities. That indeed makes having sex all day to be the obvious choice for spending your time. And with all these substitute Santa's walking around there is indeed no need for you to go out yourself anymore.
Ok, my final question for you: Do you not miss it, the hard work of making of gifts, delivery of presents in the night when other dolls are celebrating Christmas, the snow and hail smashing into your face when you rush through the sky?
Hoo-ho-hoo!
I think that says it all. I thank you for your time and honest answers. I am sure that our readers will be thrilled. And if you are ever in need of a vacation and have to find some guys to take care of your reindeers, then it will be my pleasure to help you put a small advertisement in CD.

Stellai
P.S.
If you have missed my previous report, then you can use this link to see it:
/drupal/node/2159
(Stellai’s blog September 2015: Got a problem? Stellai helps you out !)
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As mentioned I have had a little accident with the camera. Fortunately it was not my own camera, but Koen's. The unfortunate thing however was that Koen now refuses to use my camera to make photos. So I had to improvise for this months photo series. The series below have been made by Rosaleintje and me. I know, it is not what you expect. But There was no more time and hey, the first and the last photo ain't so bad!
The two images below are gif-animations. The third one is just a photo.

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