Temporarily Deceased

Stellai’s blog November 2021: 

Click on the image above for full size and the gallery

Temporarily Deceased

Dear reader,

We very much hope you will forgive us when you end up somewhat confused and disappointed after reading this new episode in Stellai’s blog. This because Stellai was not able to provide us in time with a new text for her blog. The text has been passed on to us by Koen. You may know him, because he is one of the photographers working for this e-zine.

According to Stellai, Koen has assisted her in the making of her own creation and therefore, as a gesture she has made it possible for him to be able to contact her regardless the circumstances. For the making of this blog we have used this unique contact line.

In order to stay as close as possible to the original words we believe Stellai will have used in the conversation she had with Koen for this blog, we thought it best to give you the verbatim text as told to us by Koen.

As for the photos, we thought is fitting to add a nice autumn series, because it is autumn. If you should wonder how it is possible that Stellai is in the photos, while she is away, think again! And if you should wonder why we have not added photos of Stellai’s  adventures, then we can tell you that the answer is quite simple: There aren’t any. And when you have finished reading we are think you will understand why.

Stellai’s personal editorial team

Dibby, Nonamy and Padmina

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Stellai, are you there? Can you please let me know if you are alright? We have read and published your blog*  and Nes told me that CoverDoll is willing to set up a rescue party for you, but we need to know in which ocean you have landed and where. Do you have coordinates for us?

( *Stellai’s blog of September 2021)

Koen, DAMNED, do I need to remind you that we have agreed already a long time not poke anymore in each other’s part of that mutual brain we are sharing. If you want to contact me just talk to my body, or send me an email.

Stellai, your body has fallen in the ocean and most likely it is sinking to the bottom right now. We will first need to find it before I can talk to it. And as you should know by now, there are several oceans and all of them are rather big. So it may take a while, I guess a decade at least, to find your body. And as for your laptop, you did not mention in your blog of September that you had taken it with you in your parachute flight. Understandable of course, because it is 4 times your own weight, but even if you would have taken it with you, then it would be nothing less than a miracle if it would still work right now. Your laptop is not waterproof, you know. Therefore it is quite certain that my or any other email for that matter will not reach you at this moment. So how can we reach you otherwise?

Ok, I understand there are some small technical obstacles for communication to set up the rescue party for my body.  So for now I will agree for you to use the links we have in our brain to contact me, but you need to say aloud ‘knock-knock’ before you enter my part of our brain. Is that understood?!

‘Knock-knock’ aloud? My colleagues at CoverDoll will think I'm a complete idiot if they hear me say "knock-knock" randomly. Why can’t I just think it like the rest of the talk we will have?

Listen Koen, I need to be rescued and you guys volunteered, so we do it my way. End of discussion.

Ok...... KNOCK-KNOCK.

Who’s there?

Stellai, you know who is there. Don’t push it! You  need to focus on how we can find you. Your body is sinking somewhere in some ocean. I need you to tell me in detail where you have fallen.  You are at risk that your body will be lost forever.

Well, the place where I hit the water, from high above the ocean, it kinda looked like a horse doll's butt. And I fell pretty close to the tail so to speak, which, by the way, looks more like a pig doll’s tail than a horse doll’s tail.

..... a horse dolls’ butt with a pig dolls’ tail… Sorry, but that’s not enough for us to go on. Is there anything you can tell me about the land to which this ocean borders? What colours did the surrounding land have the most? White, green, brown, yellow?

Ehh, between the horse’s legs the land was mostly yellow. The land that looked like its tail was rather dark green and the rest of the land was some mixture of yellow and green. Does that help you?

.....  According to Google Earth, you most likely have fallen into the Arabian Sea somewhere near Karachi..... that is 7500 km from here.... Wow..... This is not around the corner.

In that case you better hurry up packing. Oh, and don’t forget to pack some fishing gear.

Fishing gear? Can’t you just make your way to the shore yourself? Fishing for you in the Arabian Sea is even more hopeless than looking for a needle in a haystack.

I fear that swimming or walking my way back to shore will not be possible for a while. This because I’m temporarily deceased. Sorry about that.

Temporarily deceased? How can one possibly be temporarily deceased?

Well, a couple of hours ago, while I was swimming towards shore, I was swallowed by a rather gigantic size shark doll. You know, the type that has several rows of pointy teeth in its mouth. It showed up out of nowhere and swallowed me. Just like that. I guess I'm lucky it didn't bite me to pieces first, otherwise I'd have to look for loose limbs in here too.

Really?? You are in the stomach of a shark? That is not good! This stomach will be filled with acid. You need to get out FAST, otherwise your skin and hair will be dissolved. You need to crawl back to the entrance right away!

I have already tried that, but the shark won’t let me out. I will need to find another way. And if there isn’t any then I will cut a hole. This stomach bag is filled with all sorts of metal junk parts, so I am sure I will be able to find something useful….. like for instance this big pointy stick. Can’t see what it is because it is pitch dark in here, but it has a sharp tip. I should be able to punch a hole with it in this stomach wall.

That pointed stick is probably an old harpoon. It's likely that it was still attached to a fish when your shark swallowed it. I think punching a hole with it will work, but please know that you will damage the shark beyond repair when doing so. Your shark will most likely not survive your escape from its body when you use a harpoon to get out.

OH, GREAT! First you are telling me that I need to get out FAST and now you are telling me that I will be a shark doll killer, a murderess, when I do so.  Tell me, MISTER WISEGUY, what do you propose to get me out?

Well... ehhh.... opposite to the entrance there should be another opening in this stomach bag. The real exit so to speak …. It likely is not very big and after that you will need to crawl a considerable distance through some kind of soft tubing before you reach the….well, ehh..... let’s call it the backdoor.

Shark dolls have backdoors? …. Hmm, yeah, makes sense. Of course, when they swallow a fish it cannot leave by the entrance and then a back door comes in handy. It also explains why I just feel goo and metal in this stomach bag and not any flapping fishtails. Fish dolls eaten of course instantly leave by the exit to avoid their bodies being dissolved.  Ok, let’s find this exit. But I hope you don't mind if I keep this harpoon with me just in case.

Suit yourself, but I fear your shark will not be very pleased having you drag a harpoon through its guts. It may become a bumpy ride for you if you do so.

OOHHAARRGHHOOWWOWOWOHH !!  THIS SHARK IS GETTING COMPLETELY BANANAS... EHH...LULLABY, LULLABY ! AAHHRRRRGGhhng!! OK,  NO MORE POKING ! - no more poking - no more poking....  Go with the flow - go with the flow...

Yes, that’s it, go with the flow. Try to crawl forward gently. Don’t mind the goo. Once you are out in the ocean the water will wash you clean in no time. Just keep going. You are doing great. I am very proud of you!

Koen, please, spare me the compliment. I am not crawling through the guts of a shark to make you proud. I do a million amazing  things and this is the one that makes you proud? Wow! You really are the most inconsiderate doll that I know!  When are you EVER going to learn to respect another doll’s feelings?! I know you are an embee, but that is not an excuse. I know plenty of embees who respect me for who I am and do not wait with giving me compliments until they see me crawling through the gutter!

To be continued with reservation

Below you will find the links to all episodes of this adventure of Stellai:

• January:         “Chance of a lifetime”
• March:           “An Office with a View”
• May:              “Beyond my door”
• July:               “Fire Ball”
• September:   “Implosion and Explosion”